Custody Day

We took custody of Benjamin on Monday, January 6 at about 5:30 PM.  When we arrived around 4:00 we spent a few minutes chilling in the Eastern cafe while Fred had a cup of coffee. At 4:15 we went out into the small lobby and about the same time Benjamin and his Foster Family were coming down the stairs with the Social Worker.  They must have just finished up the pre trip report. We were escorted into the office to fill out a few forms as well received some personalized gifts (name chop/stamp and foot impressions) that were donated to Eastern by local business.  What a wonderful surprise and great gift to share with him once he's older. After this we headed up to one of the play rooms.

When we entered there was Benjamin, Foster Mother, Foster Father, and Big Brother.  We were so happy that everyone was able to attend this meeting. We knew he was very attached to all of them and we wanted to one day say we met each of them.  We played and talked (with translation) for about 30 minutes. Foster Father and Benjamin like to watch tv together and play peek a boo.  Big Brother and Benjamin like to play hide and seek together.  They shared they Benjamin is excited to see the fire trucks at Daddy's work and that he is unaware that he will be getting on a plane. Well this should be fun!

The Foster Mother packed a small suite case of stuff (pictures, diapers, Hanbok, outfit, and toys) as well loaded up the backpack we had left for him.  She included some milk, snacks, and kim-bap (rice and seedweed rolls) for his dinner. She asked if we would be coming back to Korea. Caught us kind of off guard but surely shows how much they care for him and want to see him again.  We did exchange email addresses, which makes me so happy that she wanted to stay in touch.

We grabbed a few pictures and then went down to Dr. Kim's office for a prayer and blessing as Benjamin transitions to he is new home. It was all in Korean so did not understand but it was sure nice.  During this moment I noticed that the Foster Mother was wearing the Hangul bracelet I had sent her with his Korean name on it. I almost lost it. At the end she gave us a small teddy bear that was made by a Korean adoptee in the United States and donated back to Eastern to share with all children as they leave (Rosebuddies).

After this we went back up to the playroom and collected our stuff and headed down to the lobby to find the van.  I shook the Foster Fathers hand and said "thank you" and immediatly started balling. Tried to collect myself on Fred's shoulder then proceeded to shake Big Brothers hand and thank him as well.  We were then asked to move outside and load up the van.  Foster Mother was holding Benjamin and I gave her a big hug as we all cried and thanked her over and over.  I was asked to get in the van followed by Fred.  The Foster Mother then handed Benjamin to Fred. As we sat there saying thank you and waving the Social Worker asked the Foster Family if they were ready.  Once they nodded yes the door was shut and off we went.

During the 15 minute ride back to the hotel, he was in a daze for the first part then started to cry and call out for his Omma (Mother).  Big crocodile tears and the sweetest little Korean voice : ) but so sad and heartbreaking : (  Fred continued to squeeze him tight as I stroked his hair and we repeated in Korean "it's all right"and "don't cry" and "calm." The van driver then jumped in and spoke to him in Korean while throwing in a few of these phrases as well.  Not sure what else he said but Benjamin stopped crying and just looked so sad with his bottom lip pushed out in a full on pout.  As we pulled up to the hotel we could tell another episode was coming so we got to the elevator as fast as we could and into our room. Yep another mini meltdown.  And so our family starts.

Our Amazing Race

Fred and I did indeed submit and try out for The Amazing Race about 3 years ago and sadly we were not chosen.  It was a bit hard for me to watch that season thinking that we could have been going to all of those places, completing the challenges as part of the cast. Guess we didn't have a good enough angle, interest, or intrigue in our lives.  So we decided to start our own amazing race January 2011 with the grand prize being a trip to Seoul and a son. Ended up being two trips which so far have been amazing indeed!

After 3 years, our amazing race is finally hitting the last leg. We made it through all the roadblocks, detours, speed bumps, u-turns, and surprisingly once in a while a fast forward!! So here we sit in Seoul, 9 hours until our custody meeting. This last roadblock may be our toughest challenge yet. We will once again have a few minutes to meet and play with Benjamin as we also work to secure details from the pre-trip report as we talk with the Social Worker and family.  Yep we're hoping since the meeting is at 4:30 his Foster Father and Big Brother will also be accompanying his Foster Mother. 

Not fully sure what to expect during custody meeting or as we part ways, but know it will involve tears, hugs, and screaming out. My heart is so very sad thinking this will be the last time Benjamin will see/feel the comfort of his Foster Mother (Father, Brother) after 2 years together.  I only hope he will find some comfort in us at some point during our stay in Seoul. Other families have shared their experiences of kiddos screaming and crying all the way to the hotel, kiddos shutting down and sleeping during the ride, and others have had what can be considered a peaceful ride. Guess I'm expecting the worse and hoping for the best. Whatever he needs to do to get through these first few hours we'll follow his lead.

As we start the day not sure where it'll take us but probably breakfast, hit the hot tub and sauna, lunch and then get ready for the big moment.  Fred of course is pretty laid back right now and working through jet lag, he's been up since 2:30 am.  I too was awake for about an hour and a half but able to fall back asleep for a couple more hours. So a nap may even be in store for us later this morning. 

Until next time...

The calm before the storm.

All stocked up and ready to go.